The 3 Year Angelversary A Sister’s Perspective

Deborah Lewis

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Written by Kathryn Amodeo

As the oldest sister in my family,  I always thought my job was to love, care for and protect my little sisters. When Carly was born that role only amplified. It did  not diminish.  I loved every second of it,  for 7 years. But now three years later I reflect, maybe that wasn’t my role at all with Carly. After she passed, I missed her like crazy, but I was never truly alone. My family, beautiful friends and all my amazing cousins came in to fill that void Carly had left behind. When I had tears,  they showed me how to laugh. When I had pain,  they showed me love. When I was broken and just wanted to sit in my sorrow and pain, they picked me up and carried me till I was ready to stand on my own.

I see my sister in all the people that helped me along the way and I am eternally grateful for the ones that spent their time with me in the first two broken years after she left. So you see the roles changed and I didn’t even know it. Carly truly is the one loving, caring for and protecting me, through the many people she touched when she was here. I will never know why  she was born just to be taken away from us so quickly, but I don’t think that was ever the point.  She came and lived, loved and she did it all with joy,  laughter and dance. Touching so many people’s lives, encouraging them to find  the same joy in their own life. And  that gift of unspoken knowledge,  she shared with everyone! So thank you, Princess,  for all the lessons you taught me and all the joy you gave.  I will always miss you and I love you so dang much kiddo.

❤️ 7/18/08-11/16/15

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Published by Deborah Lewis

Don't ever give in. Don't ever quit. Don't ever surrender. What gives me the right to say that? Mountains of impossibility that I have walked through: 6 1/2 years of infertility, an adoption that did not go through, two seasons of helping raise other people's children, a miscarriage, paid back every cent of 85K of debt, crisis pregnancy, raising a special needs daughter, the death of that daughter, divorce etc... With every challenge came real wounds, but something else in juxtaposition to the scars: wisdom, and treasure. Real riches found on very broken paths. Some of my closest friends have caught my tears big, wet, snotting up, warm tears, but they have also "seen" the gifts acquired along the way. They have experienced hope in hopeless situations. They have gleaned tenacity in unbearable circumstance. And to be VERY CLEAR this is not because I am strong, very much the opposite. I KNOW how weak I am. Don't give up. Don't give in. Don't surrender. "For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on You." 2Chron 20:12. My mom would say, "Shoulders back, chest out!" I would add to that, fix your eyes on the only One who declares, "You are more that a conqueror!"

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